Update: Bank of America released its first-ever year-end millennial "snapshot" that takes a look at our generation's view of its finances. One point that really stood out? Most of our parents don't believe we'll ever achieve economic independence: Almost half (46%) think they will be providing their children with financial assistance indefinitely. Millennials feel a bit better about their future, with only 28% thinking their receive parental support forever.This story originally ran on October 19, 2015.
If we’re being frank about money, many of us have to admit to relying heavily on our parents, even if we think of ourselves as grown-ass adults who are gainfully employed and financially stable. Depending on how much they’re willing to provide, parents can be the ultimate monetary safety net — maybe they pick up monthly cell phone bills, sort our taxes, or buy us countless dinners. These are such selfless acts of love, especially when we think about how these parental payments often go unnoticed.
Of course, relying on parents for help is not the case for everybody; there are plenty of resilient young people who have always handled money matters independently. Color us impressed. And that just makes the rest of us that much more grateful that our families are able to help.
Ahead, we asked women to take a moment to come clean about the many ways their parents still support them. Surprisingly, many of us have no shame in admitting that we still receive a generous amount of financial aid from mom and dad. If you're one of the lucky ones, let this story serve as a reminder to thank your parents more often. As we can all agree, a little (or a lot of) help truly goes a long way.
“I’m really lucky that I’ve always been on my dad’s health insurance. When I turned 27, my dad even went [so] far [as] to ‘employ’ me as a social media person for his company, even though the work is really minimal and I do it very part-time (he runs a small real estate company). But that’s how I still have health insurance.” — Arianne, 27
“A few years after college, when my mom realized she had been paying for my US Weekly subscription, she reprimanded me and refused to pay for it anymore, which was a sad moment for me. She then took that opportunity to complain about how I was still on a family phone plan. I begged her to continue paying it until I got on my feet financially, but here I am at age 30, still on my parents’ plan. She used to send me the phone bills, which I ignored for so long that she finally stopped, realizing I was a lost cause. One day, when I make enough money to feel secure, I'll get my own plan.” — Claire, 30
"Even though I call myself financially independent, my mother still pays my cell phone bill. Sometimes I send her a check for $100, but she never cashes it."— Alex, 26
“I'm still on the family cell phone plan and very, very grateful for it being taken care of. It's about avoiding the hassle as well as the expense. It comes up maybe once a year, when my dad will say, ‘Hey, you and your brother should think about getting your own plans.’ And I say, ‘Oh yeah, I'll totally look into it.’ But I don't.” — Elisabeth, 28
“I still bring dirty laundry home to my mom, like delicate dresses and stuff, because she takes so much better care of them than I ever would. You know those directions they provide you with for taking care of your clothes? She actually follows them.” — Kristen, 26
“My parents have always helped me with apartment stuff in NYC. When I found my first apartment, as a college grad, my dad signed as a guarantor so I could secure the spot. I lived in four more apartments during my 20s, and my parents also paid for half my rent during a time I was unemployed. Now, I’m in my 30s and I’m financially secure and make a decent salary, but my parents are still helping me out because they want me to invest in property. So the three of us co-bought a two-bedroom apartment in Brooklyn that I’m moving into after it's done being renovated, with the hopes that we can sell it in the far future, when or if I ever move out of the city.” — Becca, 31
“When I moved from New York to L.A. two years ago, my parents gifted me with car insurance by adding me to the family plan and paying for it. It’s a godsend, because I wouldn’t have known where to begin.” — Max, 29
“When my now-husband and I first moved in together, we filled up our apartment with really nice furniture that was just sitting in my in-laws’ attic. Some of the stuff, like the beautiful vintage love-seat sets, belonged to his grandmother. We really scored — I think all we bought on our own was a dining table and a bench.” — Cass, 32
“Whenever I meet my parents for dinner [in Manhattan], they give me a $20 bill afterward, so I can take a cab back to Brooklyn [where I live]. Usually, I take the subway and pocket the cash for something else. I feel kind of bad doing that, but taking cabs seems like a total waste in this town.” — Sue, 26
“My HBO Go access is courtesy of my parents’ TV subscription! Granted, I had to set up their online account when I was home for the holidays, but now I can re-watch my favorite show, The Sopranos, whenever I want.” — Rachel, 27
“I am so, so, so lucky that my dad is paying off my monstrous student loans. I’m grateful that I’ve never had to pay for anything regarding my college education. Having zero debt when I graduated meant I was able to start saving immediately.” — Virginia, 29
“My mom helps with shopping and discounts. It can be with anything, like clothing or groceries or house appliances. She’s a coupon ninja and knows how to maximize every deal. She's incredibly smart and could also negotiate with anyone, including the devil.” — Alexa, 28
“Every time I visit home, I raid through my mom’s closet for vintage clothes and accessories to take back with me. She had the best style, and I’m very happy to take them off her hands!” — Maia, 27
“I'm genuinely grateful that my parents do my federal taxes. I don't have the financial and economic literacy that they do, and I'm terrified for when they leave this earth. When it comes to money matters, I don’t have anyone whom I can completely trust to help me.” — Christina, 30
“For the last few years, since I moved to Brooklyn, my dad has given me a stack of round-trip New Jersey Transit train tickets (from my hometown to Penn Station), so that throughout the year, I can come home without having to worry about buying a ticket.” — Sally, 27
“My parents always buy my plane tickets so I can visit them in Chicago over the holidays. Since they’re the ones buying, I have no control over my return dates, and they have me hanging out for way longer than I can handle them. But they’re still the best.” — Dylan, 29
“Whenever my mom sees my choppy bangs, she hands me cash and says, ‘Get a real haircut, will you?’ I can’t help it, though; I like the way my hair looks! Besides, why would I pay a salon like almost $100 when my roommate cuts my hair for free?” — Heather, 26
"My dad always made it clear that once I moved out of the house, I shouldn't expect any financial help from him. But when he came to visit me and saw my Brooklyn apartment (a particularly dark one with three roommates and a cat), he sent me $1,000 the next week without saying a word."— Lizzie, 26
“Well, my dad helped me get my first production job because of pure nepotism. He’s a TV producer. But I’ve always worked really hard, because I would never want anyone to complain to him that I’m a bad hire. I’d like to think all my promotions and accomplishments are warranted, even if I was lucky enough to walk into the industry without struggle.” — Katie, 30
“When we got married two years ago, my husband and I didn’t have to worry much about wedding costs because between both of our parents, the whole ceremony was basically paid for. It was definitely a stressful time (and everyone had their own idea of how our wedding should be), but we were fortunate that we didn’t have to shell out from our own pockets. Now, we have a baby daughter, and we’re lucky that my parents live nearby and are always volunteering to babysit.” — Kori, 30
“Anytime my mom hits up Costco, she calls to ask what I need in bulk. It’s such a good place to stock up on things like tampons and contact solution — things that I will always definitely need!” — Sun, 29
“So, my mom or dad usually meets me once a month or every other for dinner in the city, which they pay for. Then, they usually give me money — whatever bills they happen to have on them, sometimes $20, sometimes over $100. It’s really sweet and helpful, and I never turn down a free meal out.” — Ellen, 24
“My family, and particularly my mom, is my number-one emotional supporter. If a whole week has gone by and I've been too busy to chat with her (or anyone in my family, really), I can tell it totally affects my mood, especially because I live in a different country at the moment. Calling them makes me feel less homesick.” — Krissy, 30
“I rely on my parents for endless emotional support. They got divorced when I was in college, so I call them separately for different reasons. My mom and I are both single, so we always complain about boys, and she always has great relationship advice for me. And my dad has a philosophical outlook on life and has a very ‘in the moment’ approach with me; he’s an amazing moral compass. I love them both very much.” — Lauren, 29
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